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Twenty-NOINE: Reflections on my aging.
I always loved the summer. Free from school, could finally read whatever I wanted (when I should’ve been cracking down on my summer reading list), sleeping in, staying up late. It was all so wonderful! Summer was my season until 2016, but you know all about that (if you’ve been around, I mean). Alas, I still manage to love summer for a few reasons, none of them being climate change and the number one of them being my birthday. For quite some time, I had a love-hate relationship with my birthday. It was once a countdown to the end, I thought so many times I’d just had my last one.…
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Waiting for big theatre romances is like waiting for rain in this drought: useless and disappointing–UNLESS??
Hi all, Writing this to you like it’s a fancy little email like I’m at my fancy little job at the email factory because that is my entire life right now. I’m unable to turn it off, so this is the kind of thing you’re getting. I’d like to touch base with you about the beloved yet incredibly undervalued and overlooked genre of romance and the rom-com, especially as it relates to movie theatre releases. Per my discussion on a very serious finance call with a very short agenda, the want and need of more romance and rom-coms in film was brought to my attention, and really, I couldn’t agree…
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That’s that me, Depresso – Semi-Serious Reflections on the State of my Mental Health
I could say a lot about my history with depression and anxiety. I HAVE said a lot about my history with depression and anxiety–they are inexplicably a part of me, after all. I used to analyze it all in depth, chronicling the recovery highs and lows, wondering if I was getting better at all. There was a time when I thought I was better, and I was so sure. I considered depression something I had, past-tense, and that, at that point in my life, I was just occasionally experiencing depressive episodes. Of course, I was naive (and a measly twenty-one), and I didn’t know all the tumultuous emotions I would…
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Teach a Boy to Fish & He’ll Call it a Personality Trait
I know you’ve probably read or seen or groaned over every “dating in the 21st century” post, especially ones about online dating, but looky here, another one! I’ve got two cents, so let me lay it down here. It’s a topic that comes up in many a conversation, especially with my grandmother, who just wants more grandkids already. But in this unpr*cedented time of not going out, we’re using dating apps more than ever. Or, if you’re like me, you scroll, you swipe, you observe, but you never actually match with anyone. And on the off chance that I do match with someone, the conversation is dead. Or I get…
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Brb My Brain is in the Shitter
TW: depression, anxiety, eating disorder I’ve been a little bit glossy about this, but I want to be straight up about things: I’ve been battling/struggling/surviving depression for about fifteen years now. Not properly diagnosed or anything, but um, I’m pretty freaking sure. I’m well aware that I’m not alone in this, especially right now. And while I’ve been reasonably creative during the Q, having written at 65K-word novel for NaNoWriMo, read 52 books, baked several new desserts, etc, that’s not to say that I haven’t been wildly and relatably ~not okay~. And it’s even harder during the holidays, when everything is supposed to be cheery and warm and happy. Quite…
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The Purge: Cleansing Old Wounds
Look, I’ll be straightforward here: I just put a little more than half the songs I wrote in middle school in the recycling, and I’m heartbroken. Songs and lyrics that, while not great or profound, I cherished so deeply all these years. Therapeutic diary entries about old crushes, friendships, and depression…all my feelings and thoughts boiled into three-ish verses and a chorus. So why am I tossing them? This morning, I sat down and read through them all, the melodies archived in my brain and the memories deeply rooted in who I became. I look over them whenever I move, to remind myself that I want to keep them, and…
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Thoughts on the pandemic while trying not to think about the pandemic.
It’s been difficult to come up with thoughts that aren’t about the pandemic or about what we’re all up to while staying home. It’s close to impossible to keep my mind on something unrelated. I’ve been making a lot of lists. “Ways I’ve been staying productive during work-from-home.” “Top ten movies to watch on lockdown.” “Best Brad Mondo ‘Hairdresser Reacts’ videos to make you laugh when you haven’t gone outside in a week.” “Ten things I’ve put in my cart to buy during lockdown, but have convinced myself not to.” “Ten things I DID buy during lockdown and whether or not I regret them.” “Top ten things to bake during…